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Her next step was to explain to her mother that it wasn’t a phase - a hetrosexual life was not for her. When she was a teenager, Nella dreamed of going to university. But her family were constantly urging her to get married. They would introduce her to members of the extended family, in the hope they could find a match.
It largely relies on internet shorthand, obscure symbols used by lesbians around the world. Nella would send these images and emoticons to other women. Those in the know would respond.Leila had grown up in a loving, supportive middle-class family in Bujumbura city. She was popular. She had a boyfriend. They knew of a rich man who was interested in her. There was little time to lose, they insisted. At 20 she was getting on a bit. Another photo appears and this time she is wearing loose jeans and a fitted T-shirt. It’s the same T-shirt she was wearing in the park with the women.
They could protect her while she was in the family home, but they could not guarantee her safety outside if the wrong people found out. Whenever Todd Haynes’ unspeakably beautiful Patricia Highsmith adaptation comes to mind, it brings some of the novel’s last words along with it: “It would be Carol, in a thousand cities, a thousand houses, in foreign lands where they would go together, in heaven and hell.” In that light, a spot on a list of the decade’s best films hardly seems like much of a reach. Many members of the group say they have experienced violence at the hands of family members who became suspicious about their sexuality.Two years later, Niya felt she had to tell one person in her immediate family. She chose one of her brothers. It’s hard to describe how exactly gay people meet each other in Africa,” says Leila. “You don’t have a lesbian hotspot that you can Google - a known place we can meet up.
When she came out to herself, Leila began to look for other gay people. She doubted there would be women like her in Burundi, but she searched videos on Facebook and YouTube seeking lesbians in other countries. But when he looked at her quizzically, she says the full realisation of who she is hit her. I am a lesbian, Leila told herself. US government records say that a lesbian couple was arrested in 2012 but released. Other than that, little else is documented. There is little data, and there has been no large-scale collection of testimony, so it is almost impossible to get an accurate picture of their lives.Amy and Courtney celebrate the end of finals by heading to a frat party. There, to stave off the advances of one of the boys attending, Courtney makes a show of kissing Amy right in front of everyone. It’s not all pretend, though, because as soon as they get away from the party, Courtney takes things a whole lot farther than that, and before long Amy discovers the sweet joy of another woman as she has her first lesbian sex encounter.
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