What Would the Aunties Say?: A brown girl's guide to being yourself and living your best life

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PS: That makes sense. It's always hard for South Asian women being brought up here in the UK; it was very different for a lot of our parents. What was that like for you? Did you struggle with that concept of a dual identity and not really feeling like you belong in either one? You will never find a husband in this job, be a doctor", "Indian girls never make it in those industries", "You will never make money in a creative job". When talking to South Asian Aunties about getting into a creative career, these are some of the things you might hear them. I'm joined by BBC Women's Hour presenter and broadcaster Anita Rani. We discuss her experiences as a brown woman in a predominantly white industry and the pressures of following a particular career path. PS: It's a bit of a stereotype, that all Asian parents want you to do these certain careers. Did they ever try to talk you into doing something different? Let him drink, this is what men do", "He’s drinking because of you", "Girls don’t drink” - these are some of the phrases you might hear from a South Asian Auntie on the topic of alcohol. In this episode, we’re discussing alcohol culture, predominantly in the Punjabi culture, whether there is a hidden problem, ways of dealing with alcoholism, and hearing the experiences of my special guest Dipz Danjal and how he was able to turn his life around. You will never find a husband in this job, be a doctor", "Indian girls never make it in those industries", "You will never make money in a creative job".

What Would the Aunties Say? by Anchal Seda | Waterstones

But director Domee Shi and producer Lindsey Collins couldn’t just have the cast sing any random thing — they had to develop their own chant for the movie. The pair tell Polygon that a lot of work went into making the ritual sound right. Filled with humour and warmth, and based on the podcast of the same name, in What Would the Aunties Say? Anchal shares her own experiences with the stories and dilemmas of other young women like her. It takes you through every aspect of life - from education and career, beauty standards and colourism, to dating and marriage, as well as mental health and therapy, racism and inequality - and of course, your relationship with your family. We were really inspired by Taoist chants that monks would do in Taoist temples,” Shi says. “At first, we wanted to see if there was an existing Taoist chant we could use. But then we thought, because this family is so specific, the situation is so unique — this family has this magical panda curse running through them! — we should come up with our own chant for it.” We worked with a Cantonese dialect coach, Andy. We loved him,” Shi says. “He worked very closely with with each of the actors and actresses when it came time to record the chant.”

A: Own who you are. Don't be ashamed. It's so easy to listen to the people around us, but they can be quite ignorant to what you're doing. They have no clue, and they're going to say, "Oh, no, that's not going to work," or they're going to bring negativity or judgement. Take your time, figuring out whatever you want to do. It's your life, it's your path. A: They know about it. It's really funny because my dad is plugging it to them and I'd go in and be like, "They don't need to listen to this. It's for the youngsters!" I haven't offended anyone just yet. They think it's a good thing because even they've gone through similar things — probably even worse, being from an older generation. They may feel some shame, but that's on them and that's personal, but all in all, I think everybody gets it, because they were once a young brown girl, too. PS: What's your experience with it been like so far? And is it something that you were able to talk to your family about?

What Would the Aunties Say? - Anchal Seda - Google Books What Would the Aunties Say? - Anchal Seda - Google Books

PS: Do you have any advice for fellow brown girls that are maybe struggling with their identity or have chosen less-traditional career paths? PS: Exactly. Easier said than done though! With podcast as a whole, what's one thing that you hope people will take from it?And then Ludwig was great,” Collins says. “He was like, ‘All right, so if the 4*Town song is in this key, let’s do this—’ He worked with us to make sure that rhythmically, we were doing what we needed to be doing so he could produce the remix. You know, he’s a pop record producer, in addition to being a composer. So he was able to pull the chant into his own system, along with the 4*Town song, and do this awesome remix where we were like, ‘Oh my God, it works!’ But I think it worked because he’s a magician. I’m not sure it worked because we’re magicians.”

What Would the Aunties Say? | Book by Anchal Seda | Official

A: I just want anyone that's listening to it to be like, "Me too." I want them to listen and be like, "Oh my God, I feel that," or, "I know someone that's gone through that." I want it to be a space for real stories, and I want it to be really, really relatable. I'm not sugarcoating anything. Isn’t there a cure?!”, “I hope they get well soon”, “so sorry, she will never have a normal life”, “Your childs illness is paying for your bad karma”. These are some of the things you may hear from a South Asian Auntie when seeing a child or person that may have a disability. This is a huge taboo topic within the culture, and my special guest Manal from @wakeupandmakeup shares the experiences of having a sister with cerebral palsy. PS: That's another thing, accepting the fact that there actually might be things that are wrong with us, but this is how we're dealing with it. It's OK to have things wrong with you and be able to fix them. A: Exactly. My sister recently went through postnatal depression, and she was so scared to tell people. We were just like, "No, just actually own it. Tell people that this is what you're going through, and you'll feel so much better."

The next step was making sure the voice cast — including Sandra Oh and Ho-Wai Ching as Mei’s mother and grandmother — were comfortable with the poem and with making it sound like something ancient the family had passed down for centuries. Filled with humour and warmth, and based on the podcast of the same name, in What Would the Aunties Say? Anchal shares her own experiences with the stories and dilemmas of other young women like her. It takes you through every aspect of life – from education and career, beauty standards and colourism, to dating and marriage, as well as mental health and therapy, racism and inequality – and of course, your relationship with your family. A: I think it comes down to like that feeling of shame. You're almost labeled as crazy, and I think everybody is just afraid to look bad, and that's really what it comes down to. It's one of the most brave things that you can do, and if you can openly talk to someone and say, "I go to therapy," I think that is way more brave than anything. You should own it, and it's nothing to be ashamed of. It really just comes down to that feeling of shame and the idea of being judged.